Dear Friend,
Forgive us our sins as we forgive those that sin against us.[1] This is prayed daily throughout the world as part of The Lord’s Prayer. But what is forgiveness? Why is it so difficult even for those who are on a spiritual path, when it is clearly required of us? Forgiveness is a process where letting go of negative emotions like bitterness and adopting mercy, kindness and other positive behaviours towards the perpetrator, is essential.[2] And therein lies the rub. How do we forgive those who have hurt us, often through bad behaviour, or unkind words? How can we justify or excuse their action? Does forgiving someone mean that the hurt must then simply be forgotten? Is it possible to simply go within, forgive and forget?
Being able to forgive someone may indeed require an extended period, often with daily repetition of releasing our emotional focus. However, forgiveness is not dependent on those you forgive[3], as only the forgiver needs to know about it and it does not even require your reconciliation with that person. So why is it so important – why bother to do it?
Besides the spiritual imperative, there is proven benefit to us as “empirical studies have shown that forgiveness decreases anger, anxiety, and depression and increases self-esteem and hopefulness for the future.” [4] How does this occur? When we feel aggrieved, the anterior insula in our brain lights up and we feel the pain of wanting revenge, according to neuroscientists.[5] When we forgive, says Dr James Kimmel of Yale School of Medicine, it deactivates this pain network and the addiction cravings of revenge; and reactivates the prefrontal cortex. In other words, it helps you to have stronger self-control.
There are two aspects to forgiveness: decisional and emotional[6]. The former is the choice to relinquish any furious and bitter thoughts about that person. The latter is that of substitution of unforgiving emotion with compassion, empathy etc., allowing us to view the perpetrator differently. According to Loewen (1970), there are four kinds of forgiveness: Supernatural or Divine, religious, social, and self-forgiveness (most often the letting go of guilt and shame)[7], and all intertwine and are necessary for total forgiveness.
Therapists have noted that where clients have not accepted and worked through any of these aspects, they are more likely to present with depression, anxiety and poorer physical health[8]. Research by Goldman and Wade (2012), drawn from a sample of college students, found that anger reduction was far less effective if not twinned with a forgiveness programme in the healing of victims.[9] This healing is not only emotional as alluded to earlier, but can lower your risk of cardiac arrest, improve sleep, reduce pain, blood pressure, inter alia.[10] When we cannot forgive, we remain in a state of chronic anger often with high cortisol levels, one of the main mediators of stress. This means that your immune system exists in a state of fight or flight and when this is continual, your body thinks it needs to run or battle, and can result in post-traumatic stress disorder.[11] This impacts on your micro-RNA epigenetically according to recent research from a team from University of South Florida and Harvard University and published in the journal Nature.[12]
So, when we are told in the Bible in countless places, as in Colossians 3:13: Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you,” it is not just about being a ‘good person’, but for our own good physically, mentally, emotionally, socially and spiritually.
Forgiveness is described as a seventh Attribute of the Divine in Exodus 34 gifted to us by the Grace of God. This is further detailed In Dr. Hurtak’s book, Key 4-0-3,[13] verse 362 which tells us that there are two words in Hebrew that mean Forgiveness. One, nasa, means “to lift up, to carry or take up,” an important concept of assistance in the process of forgiveness. The other, selichot, the more usual term for Forgiveness, and the final Attribute mentioned in Exodus 34:6-7, enables us to understand all the other Attributes, as it encompasses compassion. Forgiveness is often the most difficult of the Attributes to incorporate into our lives, yet, Dr. Hurtak has reminded us it is the greatest of them all. For us to obtain the freedom to thrive on all levels of our being, we need God’s Forgiveness, and to obtain that, we, likewise, need the compassion and understanding to forgive both others and ourselves.
How can we begin to embody this Attribute in our lives? We cannot achieve this without letting go of anger and resentment against anyone who has sinned against us. In working to do this, we could mindfully practise the Hawaiian process of ho’oponopono[14] through which we begin to empathise with the other person and forgive them deeply, and most importantly, ourselves, too. Without ritualising it, we could chant the Lord’s Prayer regularly, in deep contemplation of its meaning. We could meditate on the 13 repentances with accompanying Psalms in Pistis Sophia[15], which prepare us for the release from limitation and the regaining of our Light connection.
Thus, from the depths of our being we call upon you O beloved Eloah Selichot,
God of Forgiveness for the Gift of Release, Love and Promise that is ours from the Most High
With Love,
[1] Matt 6:12
[2] Enright, R. D. Forgiveness is a choice. (2001) Washington, DC: American Psychological Association
[3] https://www.psychiatrypodcast.com/psychiatry-psychotherapy-podcast/2019/4/10/what-is-forgiveness
[4] https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10120569/
[5] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gzweqap0Rzo
[6] https://charis.regent.edu/two-types-of-forgiveness/
[7] https://doi.org/10.1177/009182967001700402
[8] Toussaint LL, Williams DR, Musick MA, & Everson-Rose SA (2008). Why forgiveness may protect against depression: Hopelessness as an explanatory mechanism. Personality and Mental Health, 2, 89–103. 10.1002/pmh.35
[9] https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/10503307.2012.692954
[10] https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/forgiveness-your-health-depends-on-it
[11] Ibid
[12] https://www.nature.com/articles/s44220-025-00581-6
[13] Hurtak, J. J. 1973/2018. The Ten Light Picture Superscripts: The Keys of Enoch® and Metatron: The Third Light Picture Superscript. The Academy For Future Science. p. 107
[14] Ho’oponopono is a practice from Hawaii that revolves around forgiveness and connection. “Ho’o” means “to make” and “pono” means “right.” The repetition of pono means to make “doubly right,” according to Matthew B. James, MA, Ph.D., and president of Kona University. The phrases repeated are: I am sorry; Please forgive me; I love you; Thank you.
[15] Hurtak, J.J. and Desiree. 1999. Pistis Sophia. AFFS. Los Gatos
